It seems that every time I meet with other authors, editors or literary agents we end up discussing book covers. Authors, who have the most intimate connection with their books, usually have an idea of what they want the cover to convey to that finicky, browsing book shopper, while their editors have returned from the marketing division with something completely different. The agents, trapped in the middle by an obligation to the authors to both advise and represent, then have to chime in with an opinion that may not matter much since the publisher has the final say. The authors argue that no one in the marketing department has actually read their book, and the editors complain that the authors have no training in marketing. All very true, and at the end of the day, it seems there is very little agreement over what visual image will sell the most books. Who knew such controversy was going on behind the scenes?

My first novel, Four Wives, is a perfect case study on book covers. When I set out to write this book, I wanted to delve into real life issues that I saw around me and that I knew would resonate deeply with my target audience - women. At the same time, I am completely addicted to fast paced suspense novels, so I wrote the stories of my four characters with short, plot-driven chapters and a healthy dose of suspense. The result is a hybrid of sorts - a cross between traditional, issue-driven fiction, “chic-lit” and suspense - which is exactly what I had in mind, but which also created a marketing dilemma. Each of these genres has its own “feel” when it comes to cover design, and each is trying to call out to its loyal readership. How do you market a hybrid?

So there I was, a new author awaiting the arrival of my first book cover. The novel I had written was a realistic look at the lives of women in a wealthy suburb who had given up their careers to raise children, and now faced a whole host of issues knocking at their door - marital malaise, infidelity, ghosts from the past that had finally caught up to the present, abuse and self-doubt. There is some sex and scandal, but Four Wives is definitely NOT an east coast version of Desperate Housewives. OK, so that’s the book. Now here is the first design which appeared on the hard cover addition:

Red bra, swimming pool…. It’s eye catching for sure, but I wasn’t at all certain what it had to do with the book itself. Still, I know zip about marketing. I was fortunate to receive a good number of positive reviews, and to be invited to guest speak at numerous book group meetings. I was on countless radio shows, a couple of TV spots and had feature articles in the NYT and WSJ. Across the board, the resounding response to the book cover was I don’t get it. Turns out the women who enjoyed the book the most almost passed it by, and the women who bought it because of the cover were surprised by what they found inside.

We all agreed to change the cover for the paperback, which came out this spring. Here is that cover:

Pink, lipsticks, eye catching. I still wasn’t sure that it captured the essence of the book, but again - marketing is not my job. Four Wives was also published in The Netherlands and UK, with different covers in both countries. The UK cover is all legs and high heels. The Dutch cover is a mother surrounded by toys in her closet. Totally different approaches to the same book. This is very common, and I think it underscores the uncertainty that underlies the book cover debate. I studied media stereotyping in college and wrote a term paper on the objectification of women in advertising, and for better or worse, my research is still floating around in my brain twenty years later. My younger sister says I’m completely “aggro” about this topic. My older sister agrees. But needless to say, I preferred the Dutch cover!

As my next novel, Social Lives, is being packaged for its September 1st release, I am curious what my readers think of the cover/content debate. Did we get it right with this second cover for Four Wives? Does it matter? What makes you stop and look at a book? Does a spot on the front table at the bookstore close the deal, or do you wait for a review in the Times? And will e-books, which are essentially cover-less, make all of this irrelevant?

It’s a prickly issue for sure, and one that will likely endure given the economy and the changing face of the publishing industry. And I know that I will continue to struggle with my vision for my work, and my aversion to selling books with anything too sexy - clearly I have no future in the marketing industry But for me, the ambition will be the same - and that is to write books that people buy, read and can’t put down, regardless of what they see before turning the first page.

Wendy

I met Heather while editing Chicken Soup for the Soul - Power Moms. Heather wrote a great story about adjusting to life in the suburbs as a stay-at-home mom. In addition to raising her kids and writing stories about her life, Heather authors a blog that gets to the realities of mothering and life. Check out her blog at http://mommytruths.com! Here is my interview:

Q: How many children do you have and what are their ages?

A: Charlie is five and Sophie is three.

Q: When did you decide to leave work and stay home with them?

A: After returning to work part-time for Charlie’s first year, I decided it was too hard to return home and find him already asleep for the night (yes, my son slept from six pm to six am at about five months) and I wanted the freedom to expand into the mommy job. The two days I was off were so precious; I wanted all week to relax into being with him. My company kept me on as a consultant for 10 hours/ month which seemed like a nice solution.

At the end of Charlie’s second year, right before Sophie was born, I resumed working 10 hours/week. This seems, and is, the perfect balance except that before your kids are in school, any work means sitters or daycare and a trade-off in your time with them.

Q: What did you do before having children?

A: I started in magazine and web publishing and at the time my son was born, I was vice president at a technology research firm, managing products and launching a book publishing program with Harvard Business Press.

Q: When did you move to the suburbs?

A: I’m a country girl and have always lived in the burbs, except for a short stint in San Francisco after college. I tried living in New York City in my mid-twenties and lasted three months. My husband and I bought our first house in Weston, CT, my hometown. Scary, but true.

Q: In your essay for Power Moms, you write about the transition to being a stay home mom. Do you think most women go through this?

A: Yes! All women I’ve met who left their jobs talk about the isolation they experience when they are first home all day. I’ve heard stories from women who moved to my small town with an infant or toddler and had a really hard couple of years. I shudder to think of these talented, intelligent, driven women cooped up in their homes all day.

New motherhood is one of the hardest times to meet other women. College and workplaces foster relationships, as does the school system when your children enter preschool or kindergarten. But there’s this two to three year window where you have to actively work at networking to meet other moms and build your community.

The moms I meet who seem to find the right replacements of social interaction, creative stimulation and fulfillment after leaving their careers, are the ones who find a good playgroup or moms club, join a charitable organization to apply their skills, and regularly get out with the girls.

Q: Do you think women like to talk about the things they DON’T enjoy being at home with their kids?

A: Absolutely! What else do you think we talk about? Conversations start with the nuisance of spit up, poop and breastfeeding schedules and move to how to manage whining, sleep, and problem playmates. They also talk about missing aspects of their careers and wondering what type of part-time work to pursue.

Q: When did you decide to start writing a blog?

A: In 2007, I started writing essays about motherhood. I first approached local newspapers to start a motherhood column and when that didn’t pan out, I started my blog, MommyTruths.com.

Q: Why did you decide to do this? What do you get out of it?

A: I’ve been a writer all my life: Poetry in childhood, technology journalist in my early career, magazine editor later and short stories here and there. I was out of practice after working at a corporate job and having my two children, but I forced myself to start writing again.

I do it because it keeps me sane. Writing fulfills my creative side and expends the crazy, churning mommy madness bouncing around my head. Raising small children takes every ounce of energy, patience, self-discipline, diplomacy and playfulness I have in me. Writing about it let’s me process the joyful and more frustrating moments.

Q: What is it about mommy blogging and other internet activities that attracts so many moms?

A: I think it’s the combination of a lot of talented women who have left their careers and are seeking creative and intellectual expression and a medium that allows unrestricted self publication. Online parenting communities provide the social interaction mothers crave when they are home alone with young children.

Q: How often do you write and what things do you give up to write your blog?

A: I write twice a week on Mommytruths.com and I’m usually also working on an essay for a book or magazine and commenting on other web sites.

It’s hard to think of what I give up because writing is such a pleasure to me. But I would say sleep and decorating the house.

Q: What do you most like to write about?

A: I have fun writing about the stream of crazy events in a mother’s day. Readers comment that they’ve had a similar experience. I also like to provide practical insights and tips on everything from preschool lunch ideas, getting kids to sleep at night, finding babysitters online and I even interviewed my pediatrician on treating swine flu in kids.

Q: What are your dreams for the future - yours, not your kids!?

A: I’ve been working on a book about how to use your (former) business skills to manage motherhood and I’d like to see it published. I’d like to keep writing and publishing my work. I get a charge when I’m creatively satisfied and this is when I give my kids the best of me.  

This is all new to me. A year ago, I had just joined Facebook and MySpace to help promote my first novel, Four Wives. I had a website as well. It was incredibly strange to have so much of me out there for the world to see, and yet I came to appreciate the ability to find long lost friends. In this past year, I have had closure with three former boyfriends and “friended” countless people I knew in college and high school. One of these reconnections has resulted in an awesome joint venture on film projects. Every time these things happen, I am struck by the power of these vehicles to connect the world.

And yet … I am “friends” with many people I have never met and probably never will meet. Every day, I hear about their thoughts as they’re cooking dinner or how messy their car is after a massive playdate for their kids. I learn about their favorite restaurants and even tiffs with their spouses. It is personal, and yet impersonal. Intimate and yet a click away from disconnection. How are we to process this?

Twitter is the latest craze and good god, it is a monster! I can now catch up with hundreds of people while siting in my bed late at night. I can find out what they did all day or how they feel about swine flu or the state of the economy. I learn about their anxiety over a dinner party the next night or maybe the start of a new relationship. I know about their kids and what happened to them at school or on the playground. And I get to know all of this without seeing or even talking to them. 

And they can know about me. I have had so many moments in my life where I’ve thought “I wish someone could see this!” like the time I managed to juggle a live radio interview while folding laundry and talking to my kids via post-it notes under my door. Or those countless times when they were babies and being incredibly cute or maybe not, maybe incredibly awful and I was wondering how much more I could take before the day was over. We have all had those moments, and now instead of wishing someone could witness them with us, we can pop on Twitter, post it and have instant feedback. From strangers!

I’m not sure what I think about this. Maybe I should have titled this entry “I have no lucid thoughts on Twittering.” Some days I am grateful for the connection with the outside world. Other days I feel even more disconnected from the world because my real world friendships seem diluted by the hundreds of cyber space contacts. I imagine my children will not have any ambivalence. They will come of age with texting and Twittering and Facebook. I wonder sometimes what their relationships will be like as a result. Maybe better because they will be able to find like-minded people wherever they may be. Or maybe worse because they will be so busy on the internet that they’ll never leave their apartments. How many books have been written on this topic? Can anyone agree? Can anyone really make a prediction?

I am curious what other people think about this. Even people I have never met. Leave me a comment and I’ll be sure to “friend” you!

Wendy

One of the best things about editing Power Moms for Chicken Soup for the Soul is that I have met so many incredible women! One of those women is stay-home mom and blogger Sue Wilkey. Sue’s blog has over 1000 subscribers, so I decided to ask her how she did it. Here’s what she has to say:

Q: How many children do you have and how old are they?

A: I have 2 girls, 11 and 8, and a 17 year-old stepson who lives with us full-time. 

Q: What has been your path of motherhood - did you stay home from the beginning?

A: I did. I was working as a graphic designer when I first got pregnant, and I quit work as soon as my pregnancy started making me tired and nauseous. No one wants a nauseous designer.

Q: What were the crucial factors in making this decision?

A: I wish I could say I was conflicted and wracked with angst about leaving the workforce, but the truth is, I didn’t love my job that much. Really, I’ve always been the girl who hears the alarm clock and thinks: “How close are we to Friday.” The closest I had EVER come to ‘loving’ a job was when I bartended to make extra money at night.

Q: Have you always wanted to be a writer of some kind?

A: Always. Ever since I was a kid. But never serious stuff: I would make up pamphlets or fake newspapers to make my friends laugh. I would submit funny poems or Top Ten lists for the school newspaper or corporate newsletter. My dream job was to write Hallmark cards.

Q: What other types of writing did you do?

A: I used to have to write boring reports for market research companies, and I did some copywriting, but having to use other people’s content and structure always felt very limiting.

Q: When did you start your blog?

A: A year ago- last April. We had moved to Pennsylvania for my husband’s job and I was really lonely- really missing my friends from Connecticut. So I would write them these dopey emails, complete with graphics that I thought were entertaining. Some didn’t reply at all, some said “You need a hobby” and some said “You need a job.” And I thought: You know what? That WAS funny…and there’s an audience out there somewhere that will agree. And so I Googled ‘How to start a blog’ and that email I sent became my first post: “Lunch With Jesus.”

Q: How did you manage to build an audience - there are a lot of mommy bloggers out there!

A: Networking, networking, networking. I joined Mom Bloggers Club, Humor Bloggers, Cre8buzz, Alltop, Fuel My Blog, Facebook and Twitter. But just joining’s not enough- you have to participate in discussions and visit a LOT a blogs and leave comments.

Q: How do you decide what to write about?

A: I really didn’t ‘decide’….I just wrote about whatever popped into my head: whether it’s the bizarre stuff that happens to me, like the plant growing out of my sink, or current events, or imaginary scenarios, like Jesus giving me diet tips. Jesus pops up a lot. He thinks I’m funny, most of the time.

Q: When do you find time to write?

A: I try and write a post every 2 days, and I generally do it when the kids are at school.

Q: Do you blog for fun mostly, or do you have expectations of earning income?

A: Humor blogging is incredibly lucrative. I’m kidding. The most I’ve ever made in a month is $62 from the ads on my site. It’s for fun, it’s a creative outlet, and more than anything it’s validation: Getting those 30-60 comments per post of people saying “that’s hilarious” is so gratifying: it’s like having a boss that tells you 30 times a day you’re doing a great job. On top of that, I have close to 1000 subscribers, so I feel like I must be  doing something right.

Q: What tips do you have for other moms who want to start successful blogs?

A: Well, it depends how you define ’success’. I don’t know about selling things, but if you just want people to come back to hear what you have to say, go with your gut, be yourself, write like you’re talking to your best friend.

Q: Do you think the internet has become so overloaded that finding a committed audience is harder than before?

A: Actually, no. I think women, moms in particular, are becoming more aware of internet socializing and blogging is bringing us all closer together and making our voices heard. Mom-bloggers are becoming such a huge segment, that if you’re doing it right, you’ll get noticed. Plus, women by nature are supportive, so instead of it being a competitive atmosphere, we’re always trying to promote each other.

Q: Why do you think moms are so interested in blogging and twittering?

A: I think motherhood by design can be pretty lonely. Now suddenly there’s a worldwide community of women to connect with, chat with, sympathize with, available whenever you are - with your morning coffee, or at 3am if you can’t sleep. I think it’s essential for women to get back to that person they were before becoming wife and mother - for me, my blog and the friends I’ve made through it have done that. Whatever it takes to get you back there, I highly recommend it

Check out Sue’s blog at 

http://happymealsandhappyhour.blogspot.com/2008/04/lunch-with-jesus_10.html

With Easter weekend now come and gone, the issue of faith is on my mind. Here’s why.

The weekend started out on Friday. My kids had the day off from school and spent some time with their dad. I went for a long run, then an even longer walk with a close friend. I worked the rest of the day, had dinner with another friend and went to bed. I know there are many of you out there who are thinking this is a darn good way to spend a Friday, but it’s always hard to be away from the kids and I had my usual mini-identity crisis. Who the heck is this person doing what she pleases all day long?  But no worries - Saturday came soon enough. I rushed through the morning buying candy and stuffing over 200 plastic eggs. Then I assembled Easter baskets and hid everything in a closet. The kids returned at noon.

It was raining and cold, so we had one of those days inside where everyone fights and begs to do video games and watch TV. The day ended with a huge fight over the Simpsons, and without disclosing the gory details, I sent them all to bed early. Then I cried in my bathroom, watched some TV, and at around 11pm faced the rain and cold to hide 200 eggs in the yard with my brother.

Sunday morning arrived and the kids were still mad about the Simpsons. They searched for the eggs and fought even more about how many each was finding. At this point I threw my hands in the air, then got the kids in the car and drove into town for bagels. Along the way, I pointed out the packed churches and swarms of people dressed up for services. My kids are being raised agnostic - which really means that they are being taught about different religions and their own mixed heritage of Christianity and Judaism. We talk to them about how they have to find their own faith and beliefs about God. They are very curious about God and, overall, I have been impressed by their desire to think about God and search for beliefs that they can truly have faith in.

However….it occurred to me on this Easter sunday that they could use a little perspective. So, parked outside one of the churches, I reminded them what Easter is all about. I talked to them about the belief in Jesus Christ, his birth, his death, and his resurrection. My oldest son corrected me on some of the facts (always fun when that happens) and then we all discussed the story, whether it could possibly be true and why so many people believe it is. Nothing was decided, but their understanding was deepened and they stopped complaining about plastic eggs and candy.

When they went to their dad’s  (to find even more eggs), I went home to clean up and regroup. And along the way, I started to think about faith, not just in God or a particular religion, but in everything. The past ten years have been a long journey for me. Giving up work for marriage and kids. Dedicating more and more time to writing when there was no guarantee it would go anywhere. Divorcing and having to make a new home for my kids. When I think about it sometimes, I actually lose my breath. Everything I did was supported by nothing but faith.

Now I am staring down my 42nd birthday in a new house, taking new risks with this fledgling career that, still, comes with no guarantees, and facing the world of dating again after 16 years with the same person. Doubt follows me around like a stalker, filling my head with negative thoughts and my heart with fear. There are so many questions. Will my kids be OK? Will this career sustain me? Will I survive in this new era of internet dating and what seems to be an increasing level of human disconnection? 

There are no answers, and believe me, I have tried to find them. My friends are on the brink of sending me bills for ad hoc therapy sessions discussing the meaning of life, happiness, control, letting go. And having faith. When I was done cleaning up and getting ready for the end of this crazy weekend, I sat in my room and stared at the post-it note my youngest son had written, and of which I wrote a few weeks back. I read the words “I Love You.” I picked up the books that now have my name on them and remembered back to the first time I held one of my babies. And then to the first time I started to write a novel. And I realized that even with doubt on my heels the whole way, my children have learned to love and my work has managed to find a path. Faith means different things to all of us. Right now, I think I’ll hold on tightly to mine and see where it takes me next.

Another week, another book! Four Wives was released yesterday in paperback, with a new cover and a reader’s guide. I am very excited about this because I have been to a dozen book groups to speak about the novel and the discussions are always interesting and lively! Here is the number one question women ask me about the book:

Who are the characters based on?

My answer is always the same. An emphatic NO ONE! The truth about Love, Janie, Marie and Gayle is that they are completely fictitious. Every author has her own method for constructing a novel. Some start with a character and build the plot around her. Others begin with a plot and construct the characters to give life to the action. And others, including myself, have issues they want to explore in the novel and then we develop characters and plot to explore those issues. Each of my four characters began with an issue that I saw around me every day as a veteran stay-at-home mom in the suburbs of Connecticut. I thought about how I could examine those every day issues through my characters and the plot that evolves throughout the book.

Love was the first to emerge. I was thirty-six when I started writing Four Wives. I had three small children and had been at home with them for six years. Like Love the first time we meet her, I was nursing my youngest child at three in the morning. I was going through a period with no baby sitter help and spent my days driving and juggling, and my nights in small segments of broken sleep. More than anything else, I longed for naps and coffee, and on that particular night I was thinking about how strange this life was. I had been a lawyer and a banker. I was approaching middle age. My life was a cocktail of physical exhaustion and mental starvation and I was not satisfied. But at the same time, I loved my children more than I had ever imagined I could love anything, and I wanted to be with them, seeing every precious moment of their development. And I was not alone. This issue was so prevalent among my peers it seemed that sometimes it was all we talked about, when we had time to talk at all. That night I turned my thoughts to a character in this same stage of life, and I gave her a plot that takes the reader through her struggle with this very common conflict for stay-home moms. 

Marie was next. It was clear to me early on in my life as a suburban wife and mother that the dynamics of marriage are altered when there is a complete division of labor within the family. Marie and her husband used to share a life as high powered lawyers, and suddenly they find themselves living separate lives – Marie as a part-time lawyer and full-time homemaker, and her husband working ridiculous hours in New York City. Everything has changed for them, and just to make things more interesting, I threw in the perfect temptation for Marie – an attractive, young intern who looks at her the way her husband used to.

Gayle evolved in my mind over several weeks. One of the main constructs of suburban life is the pressure to be married and stay married. I wondered what it would be like for a woman who was in a marriage that was verbally abusive and destructive. The fault lines are hidden. The damage slow-burning and cumulative, making it difficult to gather the conviction to leave. Gayle took on this issue. She is generous and kind-hearted, and understands that it is her family’s incredible wealth that drives her husband into his fits of rage. But there is so much talk among her peers about the ups and downs of marriage that Gayle has a tough time realizing how bad her marriage really is – until she sees things through the eyes of a trusted employee and friend.

Finally, we have Janie. I could not write a book about marriage in the suburbs without touching on the issue of malaise. No matter how strong a marriage, after twenty years or so, the relationship is simply not the same as it was. Sometimes the bond grows stronger. And sometimes, as it is with Janie, the bond disappears leaving nothing but the bare-boned structure of the life built together. Janie loves this life, her kids, her daily routine. She just doesn’t love her husband, nor does she feel any love from him. And, like many people, she mistakenly believes that an affair will somehow fill this gap within her so she can keep everything she has. 

Four Wives. Four issues. When people tell me that they think they know who Janie really is, or who Marie is based on, I always set them straight, but at the same time feel a bit gratified. If readers think they know my characters, then I have done my job in making them relatable. Let me know what you think!

Wendy

Power Moms came out yesterday and my whole life changed in an instant! I got up at 6am, fed the goldfish, made some coffee, packed a lunch and woke the kids. They snuggled on the couch watching Spongebob while I made frozen waffles. When they weren’t eating, I hit the pause button to get them started. Now late, I rushed upstairs (and my head got that “I’m too friggin tired to be doing this” feeling) to get the clothes and put in my contacts. Threw the clothes in the dryer, loaded the car. With 5 minutes to go, I put the now warm clothes on my kids’ respective laps, inspiring them to get dressed before the clothing cooled off (I love this trick!). In the car, drive to school. Drive home, get back in PJ’s, reheat coffee and sit by the fire in time for interviews. At 9am I did a radio interview in Canada. At 11 I did another. At 12 I stuffed some envelopes with forms for soccer club and tried to balance my check book and pay bills. Made more coffee - feeling sick for some reason…. yes - forgot to eat! Made a protein smoothie to be good, then snacked on chips (AS IF a protein smoothie could be remotely satisfying). I took a long, deep breath to settle my thoughts so I could finish a new book proposal to show my manager in LA (it’s far less “Entourage” than it sounds, believe me!). At 1:30 I changed into running clothes and loaded Power Moms PR materials into my car. Then I drove to the local library to drop them off. Next to the track where I WILLED myself to run. Got lapped twice by some young show-off, even after I tried to pick up the pace. Pathetic! At 2pm I hit the road to pick up 3 kids at two different schools. Dropped one at home, took the other two out for a treat, then karate. Home again. Dinner, hot tub, showers, homework, PJ’s. We made brownies and settled in to watch American Idol. But some guy was giving a speech and it wasn’t on. Who does this guy think he is, the President? No one gets to disrupt American Idol night! Watched Spongebob instead (we’re on a fix these days) and made ourselves feel better by loading the brownies with extra fudge and ice cream. We did our “highs and lows” for the day and I mentioned that my book came out. The kids kept eating, one eye on the TV to make sure they didn’t miss the end of the commercial break. Then they went to bed (I say this with a few words, but putting my kids to bed is like pushing a large rock up a mountain), and I had a glass of wine from a bottle I opened three days ago. It tasted a little off, like I really cared, but I did make a mental note to drink faster next time I open one. Then my day ended when I got into bed to watch an episode of 24 that I recorded three weeks ago (I am way behind).

WAIT! My life hasn’t changed at all! I realized this about the third time Jack Bower almost got killed, and I hit the pause button. I felt a little panicked, like did I miss something? Was I supposed to do something special today and I missed it? Nope. The book is out, and it’s a great book and every time I talk about it to the press I am genuinely excited and proud. But there’s nothing to do except keep living the life I’m living, which (thankfully) I happen to love.

I was about to hit play again when I happened to see this yellow post-it note that my 5 year old left for me a couple of days ago. Out of the blue, he started drawing a heart on the mini-note pad, then asked my brother (who lives with us) to help him write “I love you.” He then came upstairs where I was  helping his brothers to learn about not leaving wet towels on the floor, and just stuck it to my desk - without a word. A few minutes later, I went to see what it was and everything just stopped. I had this moment of pure joy - the kind that has to come from nowhere to be authentic. I had done nothing special that day. My son was just feeling it and decided to write it down.

So before I rejoined Jack Bower and his mission to save the world in one day, I was reminded that the greatest reward from doing this job of mothering, and writing so I can be a stay-home mother, is not any sort of life-changing event when my books are released, but instead the indescribable gift contained within that post-it note.

Wendy

We are exactly one week away from the official launch of Chicken Soup for the Soul - Power Moms, and two weeks from the relaunch of my novel, Four Wives, in paperback. Needless to say, I am in the throws of promoting! Two days ago I was in Florida chasing my 5-year old across a pool deck, and today I have already had two interviews for the books (one requiring make-up of all blessed things!). For anyone local, check out channel 12 tonight starting at 5pm! And for anyone wondering what this is like - promoting a book - let me just say that my life has never felt stranger than it does right now…

I had this fantasy while I wrote my first novel in the back of my minivan. It went like this: write fabulous novel, appear on Oprah, make enough money to take a long breath, meet George Clooney (inside joke). Of course, none of these things can actually drive a person to finish a novel - what makes you finish is the intense desire to have the scrambled thoughts in your head find themselves as words on pages, and in a form that someone else might actually be able to understand and relate to. This part, the actual writing, is the part that makes me feel whole and sane and able to spend the majority of my days being a mommy. And this writer’s life, the one where I dropped the kids at school and spent a few hours alone with my laptop, felt normal after a while.

As the fantasy turned out, I wrote the novel then edited Power Moms for Chicken Soup for the Soul, and without Oprah, the book has to be promoted the old fashioned way. With a team of publicists, the message of the book gets out through print, radio, blogs and TV. Word is spread cross the internet over facebook, twitter, personal blogs and emails. And, for good measure, over 500 mailings are sent. By the time it winds down, I will have done a handful of TV spots, a dozen or so radio and print interviews, and at least three book events.

I have moments when I’m speaking about my work in public when I want to hit the pause button on the whole scene. I feel passionate about my work so telling others about it has never been the problem. But there is a whole other piece that I can never adequately convey. It’s a quintessential Power Mom piece. There I’ll be, dressed nicely, hair blown, make-up on… and I’ll be speaking with confidence and (hopefully) articulation about the book. And it all just feels so put together and picture-perfect when the reality is that an hour before hand, I was probably driving my minivan with my slippers on, hair dirty and pinned up, three kids in the back needing good parenting or appropriate discipline or positive reinforcement and my brain fully focussed on the task - my work, my other work, will be the last thing on my mind. I probably had a cold mug of coffee clutched in one hand, the other on the wheel, and I was probably drinking it because it still gave me a shred of comfort after a hectic day. And when the interview or book signing is over, I will rush home, wash off the make-up, put the slippers back on and kiss my kids good night or help with homework or whatever is needed at the time. And I will feel like I have been living in two alternate worlds.

So, yes, it is strange because most of the time, as I am discussing my work, what I really want to do is hit the pause button and say, as loud as I can, does anyone know what my crazy day looked like? Really looked like? Not to mention what I really look like most of the time …

The beauty of promoting Power Moms is that most of you do know. And it is my mission for the next few months to promote these books and share our stories with the world!

Stay tuned!